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One edge
hanging over the mountain--
the Milky Way

---Shiki
____________________________

I'm putting on
the shoes I took off
in July

3 comments:

Paul Smith said...

David I really like the humour here. It makes me think of a very long restful summer! I wonder if the omission of 'I am' from L1 would polish this a little more.

Humbly
Paul

John McDonald said...

yes great one
john

Area 17 said...

I agree with Paul, a good poem but it needs a kire (kireji).

Alan