Autumn

.
lifting me away
from the computer
to my kitchen window
the early morning honks
of migrating canada geese
.

nora said...: Britons have Canada geese? Who knew?

Lovely 'ku too!; October 06, 2009
Area 17 said...: We got Canada geese galore. They were off to Slimbridge, home to birds from all over the world!

Slimbridge, created by the lovely Sir Peter Scott.

Slimbridge weblink: Slimbridge

Alan; October 07, 2009
Crafty Green Poet said...: lovely...; October 08, 2009
Paul Smith said...: A tanka Mr Summers! It works really well Alan, a lovely gentle movement unfolding.

I wonder if dropping one of the 'my's from L2/3 and simply having 'the' might just tighten it a bit...

lifting me away
from the computer
to my kitchen window
the early morning honks
of migrating canada geese

(Just a thought!)

I love 'early morning honks'

Best wishes
Paul; October 08, 2009
Kelly M. said...: Those Canadian geese do have a way of making one rise from one's seat -- I like the "lifting" part of this! Wonderful, Alan --; October 08, 2009
Area 17 said...: Thanks for all the comments, and thanks Paul for the edit advice! ;-)

I've changed it now, and appreciate the proofread very much.

I've written a few tanka or tanka like poems now, and must remember to submit them. Too haiku and renga focused at the moment. ;-)

Alan
1000 Verse Renga
.; October 10, 2009
Jenn Jilks said...: There is nothing more comforting to me than fall and the geese. Like going home.; October 14, 2009

Autumn Events